23 October, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1072, Directions to Run #1073

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hare's view of the 1072nd Hash:

"It was a lovely Jerusalem day with weather perfect for running. How to explain the lack of Tel Avivians on such a lovely day? Wanking, perhaps? Caveman arrived with beer in tow, joined by Boston C., G-father and Just Michael. Puppy Love Machine, Magically Delicious and Ninja (the doggie formerly known as Chili) came up from the Dead Sea, Cummunion drove in from his new Ramallah digs and we were off -- with only a 40 minute delay. All ran except PLM who elected to stay behind and make sure the beer didn't get lonely. Little Ninja, however, was up for a run and only got stepped on 3 times. At the halfway, the gawking and hooting onlookers were treated to "Father Abraham" and a flash of what goes on under Magic's kilt, accompanied by a spirited "Kiss my ass"! We went on to take in the view atop Caveman's Erection and learned that its suspension is computer-driven. At Down-downs, it was suggested that Just Michael be named -- all suggestions are welcome so start thinking, wankers."

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1072:
Hare: Boston Creamed
FRB: Captain Caveman
DFL
: Just Michael
Latecomers:
Cummunion, Magically Delicious, Puppy Love Machine
Relievers:
Capt. Caveman, Gonadfather
Dog Abuse: Boston Creamed, Cummunion, Magically Delicious, Puppy Love Machine
No walkies: Puppy Love Machine
No shit:
Just Michael (for not bending his knees during "If I had the eyes of an eagle...")


Directions to Run 1073:
Meeting timeSaturday Oct. 25th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.

Location: Edith Wolfson Park - Tel Aviv Note: According to your Hare the meeting point is somewhere in the middle of the park (here). I'd go for the parking lot, but what do I know?

On-After: Nope.

Maps: From LaGuardia interchange in Ayalon highway (road #20)

Directions: See map above

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit; If you do get lost, just...


Call
Magically Delicious @ 053-2805002


Other messages:
  • New Hare Roster will be out next week so if you have any special requests, send'em now!
  • REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

Hash#

Date

Hare

1074

01/11/2014

Fluffer

1075

08/11/2014

Twin Peaks

--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

18 October, 2014

(Hash Trash Run #1071,) Directions to Run #1072

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hash Trash's view of the 1071st Hash:


"There was a Hash"

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1071:
Hare: Roadkill
All Else: DK

Directions to Run 1072:
Meeting timeSaturday Oct. 18th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.

Location: Corner of King George and HaMalot St. Jerusalem (here).

On-After: Yes! @ Link Pub

Maps: From Caveman's erection Here

Directions: See Here (same as above)

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit; If you do get lost, just...


Call
Boston Creamed @ 054-2152653


Other messages:
  • New Hare Roster will be out next week so if you have any special requests, send'em now!
  • REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

Hash#

Date

Hare

1073

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1074

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks

1075

08/11/2014

Fluffer




--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

10 October, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1070, Directions to Runs #1071

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hash Trash's view of the 1070th Hash:


A partisan Hash at the lovely Jordan River, I think some Hashers were there cause I saw the pictures...

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1070:
Hare: Don't Know
FRB: Don't Know
DFLDon't Know

Directions to Run 1071:
Meeting timeSaturday Oct 11th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.

Location: London Square (AKA "London Garden", "London Park" and "the concrete park next to McDonalds on HaYarkon"), HaYarkon, Tel Aviv (here).

On-After: Yes! Oui! כן! It's an Oktoberfest+Birthday Hash!!

Maps: From HaShalom interchange (on Ayalon Highway - Road #20) Here

Directions
:
 See map above

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit; If you do get lost, just...

Call Roadkill @ 050-6899882


Other messages:

REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

Hash#

Date

Hare

1072

18/10/2014

Boston Creamed

1073

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1074

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks

1075

08/11/2014

Fluffer


--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

26 September, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1068, Directions to Run #1069

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hash Trash's view of the 1068th Hash:


"It was a lovely F**cking HOT day... 

We've all gathered in south Tel Aviv, striving for an intellectual hash and annoying both Haaretz and The Marker publishing. 
The trail was amazing, no shiggy but lots of rubbish , we've enjoyed several PS's opportunities: a Prayer Stop, a Play Stop and a Pee Stop. 
Beer was drunk, songs were sang, civilians were (not) impressed

There was much rejoicing."

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1068:
Hare: STD @ double Entry
FRB: RoadKill
DFL: Popo Schikse
Shitters: Just Bethany, Roadkill
Returnee: STD
Misnaming: Popo Schikse, Just Florian, Just Bethany
had no idea she's setting next week: Magically Delicious

Directions to Run 1069:
Meeting timeSaturday Sep 27th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.

Location: Parking Lot on Elifelet St. HERE.

On-After: Yes! Oui! כן! @"Norma Jean"
Notes: may want to bring a change of clothes if your costume is on the risque side... not sure Norma's will let us in...

Maps: From La Guardia interchange on Ayalon Hi-way Here

Directions: (from La Guardia interchange
1. Head west on La Guardia/לה גווארדיה‎ toward Exit to Route 1/יציאה לכביש 1‎
2. Slight left onto HaRakevet/הרכבת‎
3. Turn left onto Derech Menachem Begin/דרך מנחם בגין‎
4. Continue onto Derech Jaffa/דרך יפו‎
5. Continue onto Eilat/אילת‎
6. Turn left onto Elifelet/אליפלט‎
7. Turn right
Elifelet Parking Lot


And about the not finding the spot and all that shit; If you do get lost, just...

Call Magically Delicious @ 053-2805002


Other messages:

REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

Hash#

Date

Hare

-------

04/10/2014

Yom Kippur – No Hash

1070

11/10/2014

Boston Creamed

1071

18/10/2014

After Birth

1072

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1073

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks

1074

08/11/2014

Fluffer


--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

17 September, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1067, Directions to Run #1068

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hash Trash's view of the 1067th Hash:


"Well, from what I hear, there wasn't much of a Hash last Sat. But at least they had beer..."

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1067:
Hare: Goldmember
All Else: Double Entry

Directions to Run 1068:
Meeting timeSaturday Sep 20th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.

Location: HaMerets St. Tel Aviv (here).

On-After: Yes! @ 24Rupee

Maps: From Hashalom Interchange on Ayalon Here

Directions: See Here (same as above)

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit; If you do get lost, just...


Call
STD @ 054-4682008


Other messages:
  • REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

Hash#
Date
Hare

1069

27/09/2014

Magically Delicious

1070

04/10/2014

Fluffer

1071

11/10/2014

Boston Creamed

1072

18/10/2014

After Birth

1073

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1074

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks



--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

12 September, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1066, Directions to Run #1067

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hare's view of the 1066th Hash:


"'Twas a sunny afternoon in the holiest of mountains. Hashers assembled in what at first seemed a pretty easy-to-find location, but as they will soon find out, to some (aka Cummunion) even a straight line with no turns qualifies as difficult directions to follow. Some Hashers did in fact travel back to the 60s, but most looked like their regular half-minded selves.
After the usual "who's the f*cking RA this time??" banter, the Hare gave the signal and the Hounds were off. As expected from a trail around Jerusalem, up/downhills were plentiful and flats were nowhere to be found. At the halfway, after enjoying one of our favorite past times - frightening little kids while hand-flailing and singing like idiots, the Hashers left to go on a shiggy-than-ever trail. There was much rejoicing when they found at the end of that shiggy a peaceful beer stop, complete with mountain views and chairs to sHit on. With ale in our stomachs, we kept on going for a few more climbs back for the ON-IN.
Honorable mentions are in order: Gadhafi, who by the second hold had already made it clear to all that he's taken the infamous role of checking-it-out down every false trail possible; Captain Caveman & Roadkill, who in their own minds are avid Hounds aching to keep running, whereas the rest of know they're just racists who would not stop on holds and wait for their fellow Hashers; and Magically Delicious, who in the circle was reminded of the strict circle-rules, which probably made her think that here in the Holyland the A in RA probably stands for A-hole.
After a down-down festival that combined singing, burping, crying, touching, dancing, peeing, and some more drinking, this Hare realized it's been more than an hour and we're still standing there jerking around and decided to call it a day. Other Hashers were still there when I left, so if anyone finds a drunk Puppy Love Machine on the road, please pick up the phone and call 1-800-LEAVE'EM-THERE"

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1066:
Hare: Fart Smella
FRB: Capt. Caveman (aka Rocky Balboa)
DLF: Boston Creamed
SCB: Magically Delicious, Fecal Flyer
Not Waiting For Check It Out (Racists): Capt. Caveman, Roadkill
Shitters: Fecal Flyer, Gadhafi, Capt. Caveman, Magically Delicious, Running Poo, Crock Sucker, Puppy Love Machine
Late Cummers: Puppy Love Machine, Cummunion
No Flowers: Fecal Flyer
No Hash Gear: Cesspool
Returnee: Fart Smella
Misnaming: Crock Sucker, Boston Creamed, Cesspool
False Accusation: Running Poo
Hands On Hips (??): Cesspool, Cummunion
Lid In Circle: Popo Shnitzel
Give A Note? Nah, I'll Just Take A Down-Down: Running Poo
Premature Ejacu-singing: Magically Delicious
More Songs!: Roadkill

Directions to Run 1067:
Meeting timeSaturday Sep 13th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.

Location: Kfar Sava, at the the parking lot of the Supermarket on the corner of Tchernikovski and Begin (here).

On-After: Nope

Maps: From Road #4 Here

Directions: See Here (same as above)

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit; If you do get lost, just...


Call
Goldmember @ 052-3980164


Other messages:
  • REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

1068

20/09/2014

STD

1069

27/09/2014

Magically Delicious

1070

04/10/2014

Fluffer

1071

11/10/2014

Boston Creamed

1072

18/10/2014

After Birth

1073

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1074

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks


--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

04 September, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1065, Directions to Run #1066

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hare's view of the 1065th Hash:


"Run 1065 will be remembered as the run where the HHHH almost won the Israel National Cricket championships, however we forfeited our winning in order to drink beer and eat spicy fried onions.
Yes it was hot and Magically Delicious was hot and still the only female, but at least not all of the guys were over 60. (wow, I can see the drool-pool from here! -HT)
We ran through half-naked women, international sports and smells, and capped it off with kids screaming while daring death-defying acts."

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1065:
Hare: Captain Caveman
Shitty Trail: Captain Caveman
FRB: Cummunion
DFL: Fecal Flyer
Returnees: Head Down, Double Entry
SCB: The Pack
Virgins: Just No one


Directions to Run 1066:
Meeting timeSaturday Sep 6th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.
Location: Har'el St., Mevaseret Zion (here)
Maps: From: Tel-Aviv, J-Lem
Directions: Go straight at the first roundabout on Har'el st., find a park on the side of the road.
Theme: We'll be celebrating peace instead of war, dressed as hippies! So get 'yer Woodstock on!

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit...
Call Fart Smella @ 0544-888-165


Other messages:
  • REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

1067

13/09/2014

Goldmember

1068

20/09/2014

STD

1069

27/09/2014

Magically Delicious

1070

04/10/2014

Fluffer

1071

11/10/2014

Boston Creamed

1072

18/10/2014

After Birth

1073

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1074

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks



--
On-on!
Hash Scribe

29 August, 2014

Hash Trash Run #1064, Directions to Run #1065

Hello fellow Hashers!

Hare's view of the 1064th Hash:


"Despite the fact that is was August and it was Jerusalem, a group of some 15 hounds showed up for #1064, led by a most reprehensible delegation from Tel Aviv and shouldered by a most venerable representation from the Land of Oz
It was the best of trails. It was the worst of trails. The walkers overshot the beer stop, it was alleged, due to a flat tire on a stroller. This led to a watery rendition of Shitty Trail.
But all was forgotten at the Circle as the pack drank all the beer, ate all the snacks and sang all the hymns. A dirty dozen subsequently retired to the First Train Station to extend the debauchery. The First Train never arrived, so the crew departed some time after dark, bowed but not broken."

So on we go to the...

Down-Downs Run 1064:
Hares: Gadhafi, Hot Box
FRB: Magically Delicious
DFL: Boston Creamed, Popo Schikse
Visitors: Jordie La Foreskin, Cesspool, Running Poo
Returnees: Crock Sucker, Just Yoram, Cummunion, Puppy Love Machine, Popo Schikse, Capt. Caveman
Shortcutting: Gonadfather, Boston Creamed, Puppy Love Machine
Overshooting the Beer Stop: Walkers
Leaking: Just about everybody
Sitting/Leaning: Too many to remember
The old Flat-tire-on-the-stroller excuse: Crock Sucker


Directions to Run 1065:

Meeting timeSaturday Aug 30th., 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.
Location: Parking lot @ Hadar Yosef Stadium, Tel Aviv (here)
Maps:
  • From Ayalon: Get off @ Rokach heading East and follow this
  • From #4: Get off @ Em HaMoshavot heading West and follow this
Make a left in the car park and move to the eastern end

And about the not finding the spot and all that shit - seriously?? This was the starting point for about 20,000 hashes! Get a grip, man!
Call Captain Caveman @ 052-244-5644


Other messages:
  • REMINDER: The hare is now responsible for writing the Hash High Lights while Hash-Scribe will only rewrite it however the hell he wants, so get your pencils ready!

Hare Raising Roster - are you there?!

1066

06/09/2014

Fart Smella

1067

13/09/2014

Goldmember

1068

20/09/2014

STD

1069

27/09/2014

Magically Delicious

1070

04/10/2014

Fluffer

1071

11/10/2014

Boston Creamed

1072

18/10/2014

After Birth

1073

25/10/2014

Crock Sucker

1074

01/11/2014

Twin Peaks



--
On-on!
Hash Scribe